I’ve never considered myself to be an “artsy” type. The older I’ve gotten though, the more I value creating and practicing the arts. When I was growing up, my love for sports always came before piano practice. My artwork was always considered average by the art teacher, and I never won a coloring contest or had my picture chosen to represent anything extraordinary. That’s ok. I think early on, I realized that doing something artsy, was more of a blessing for myself than for others.
The tears came and that’s ok. I needed to let them out. I’m healing, but I’m not healed. Mother’s Day was a reminder that I won’t get what my heart truly longs for until we’re ALL together in heaven.
Because of those songs, I learned some very valuable promises of God and experienced watching the joy on my parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles faces as we sang about heaven someday.
I’ve been wondering
As I’ve been pondering
The things that you must know
Once you’ve stepped through
Once you break through
To heaven, now your home.
When you’ve watched someone face their own mortality, it truly changes you. I’ve shared before that suddenly what used to be important is no longer important. It’s a quick filter for realizing quickly what is eternal, and what isn’t. I’ve been feeling convicted lately about something.
I know that I have been blessed, but my grief tells me otherwise and reminds me of all the things that have been taken away from me because she’s gone. We’ll never get to experience the joys of seeing her graduate, marry, have children, etc… the list could go on and on.
The glowsticks have become a way for us to symbolize you and the light that you shined. We hope to keep your glow going. Thank you for inspiring us and showing us how one willing heart can have an impact on a whole community of people. We’re excited to formally announce today…..
Tomorrow is your birthday. Such a special day to us and always celebrated, but this year it feels so different. I still want and need to celebrate you, but there is such a cloud of grief still hanging over my head because I just ache to be near you… to hear your laugh, see your smile, and look into your eyes. What I wouldn’t give to hug you! That cloud lifts at times and I’m able to feel the warmth of the sun. It’s helping.
In the quiet
Dead on the inside
Still within my grief
You whisper to my broken heart…
One thing that has brought me comfort at home is to implement meaningful items into our decor that remind me of Sarah or statements of promise that come from scripture about heaven. I need to keep her pictures around me and God’s promises in front of me. I can’t help but think that others who are grieving with hope, must feel the same way.