It’s shocking and heartbreaking to see so many families hurting and I can’t help but contemplate the effects of grief on our current society. Realizing that everyone’s grief journey is different, I do think there are a few things that I have learned on my own journey that I’d like to share.
Some days I just can’t-
look at your pictures,
listen to your voice,
hold your things,
hear your songs…
I’ve been feeling quiet in my spirit. I know it’s because I’m processing so many things all at once: it’s almost been one year since Sarah’s death, trying to parent and support a 14 year old who is also dealing with grief and so much change,
Life goes on, but my heart still hurts. We knew that after the hard past couple of years, that we needed to move forward and take a family trip. Usually family vacations are so fun to plan and there’s so much to look forward too, but when you’re grieving, even vacation planning looses it’s excitement. It becomes one of those things that you know is good for you, but you’re just not feeling it.
I’ve never considered myself to be an “artsy” type. The older I’ve gotten though, the more I value creating and practicing the arts. When I was growing up, my love for sports always came before piano practice. My artwork was always considered average by the art teacher, and I never won a coloring contest or had my picture chosen to represent anything extraordinary. That’s ok. I think early on, I realized that doing something artsy, was more of a blessing for myself than for others.
The tears came and that’s ok. I needed to let them out. I’m healing, but I’m not healed. Mother’s Day was a reminder that I won’t get what my heart truly longs for until we’re ALL together in heaven.
Because of those songs, I learned some very valuable promises of God and experienced watching the joy on my parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles faces as we sang about heaven someday.
I’ve been wondering
As I’ve been pondering
The things that you must know
Once you’ve stepped through
Once you break through
To heaven, now your home.
When you’ve watched someone face their own mortality, it truly changes you. I’ve shared before that suddenly what used to be important is no longer important. It’s a quick filter for realizing quickly what is eternal, and what isn’t. I’ve been feeling convicted lately about something.
The glowsticks have become a way for us to symbolize you and the light that you shined. We hope to keep your glow going. Thank you for inspiring us and showing us how one willing heart can have an impact on a whole community of people. We’re excited to formally announce today…..